Dear Java Guru,

I'm sorry to inform you that have a password free open port with a strong signal next to the place I need to run some errands in ripe ground for pirateing. I live in a tent and don't have money for you shitty coffee, or the tolerence for your yuppie trash clientle in your small but corporate shop. Having a free port means that I can use it without having to drink your swill or deal with people.
I personally believe that information and the internet should be free for everyone, which is why I have this handy little wi-fi card. Since you portrayed yourself as a hip little joint I thought perhaps you had an open mind and felt the same way. Unfortunetly your pastey and awkward night manager informed me otherwise. Here are a few helpful suggestions if you don't like pirates in your parking lot after hours:
- Get a password. It's not hard. It takes 30 seconds if that and you can give it to paying customers after you relieve them of their money.
- Turn off your server when you close down for the night. If only people buying coffee may use it there's not reason to keep it on and open.
- Pull the stick out of your ass. My not purchasing a $6 cup of coffee and than useing only enough bandwidth to run AIM won't break you, I promise.
I hope you find these suggestions helpful. Should another parking lot confrontation arraise I'll make it a point to pee in your espresso beans.
Cat