Insignificant Turd Toucher
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| Wednesday, December 24th, 2008 | | 10:21 pm |
Merry X-Mas! Aunt Flo is here to stay
Anyway.. Happy Holidays, whatever people may celebrate. I've been getting alotta slack from people about my support (as lazy as it is) of the season. Blah blah blah,christmas consumer whore, they rant. That's not the point. The point is I think it's awesome to give gifts to people. All year round it's awesome. And it's Just as nice to get something for then at the traditional gift giving itme of year in our culture. Winter is hard for many people and a little bullshit trinket can really brighten up the darkest, coldest, nastiest parts of the year. Really. This is the traditional time of year to let people who you haven't spoken to in ages know that you still think about them, and often miss them. Through a message, a card, a gift, a hand job, whatever method your prefer. For me, it's not santa, it's not the birth of jesus, it's not getting awesome things, it's letting people who you have lost, or even maintained, contact with know that they are loved. So there it is. Happy holidays. I love you guys. Even in the stand outside your bed room with a boom box kinda way. Merry Christmas Happy Kwanza. But fuck Hanukkah, that's not even a big holiday for you guys. You wait until Rosh Hashanah! And on that note, happy very late birthday Nikki! You have something Awesome on its way, it's waiting on some money from the government to buy the appropriate chemicals but it's Totally worth it! | | Saturday, November 29th, 2008 | | 2:45 am |
Happy Birthday Kyt! (Link to Kyt's LJ goes here when I don't have a fever) | | Wednesday, August 27th, 2008 | | 2:09 pm |
Death to Everything I hate!
I'm still not dead!! Workin in NY still, it's been pretty crazy. I got a job as a department head and I'm managing the prop and paint shop. Got my own crew and everything! By crew I mean miss Kim Bianco. She works like 10 men though, so whatevah! 4 weeks in to the Faire and things are starting to settle down. My kidneys were acting up and I got the flu, but things are ok. My new trailer is awesome, my new truck is still rolling. And I've got a stage show at this faire! It's madness. I'm part of the Pyrus and Scorch fire show playing to usurper Crepe Suzette. I even wound up on CNN.com for the fire stuff http://www.ireport.com/docs/DOC-62157And on some unknown cable station for the pickle sellers gig. Might be on Good Morning America soon with somea the cast, we'll see how much help they need. It's right after a 3 day weekend. yikes Anyhoo, if anyone wants to come see the show lemme know and I'll get you guys some freeee tickets yeah! Other than that it looks like I shoould be in MD for the winter. It sucks about the school, but I would liek to b e home for a while. There's not going to be anyone living on site this winter and it just seems Dumb for me to live by my self in a snowy campground. So fuck that. Love for everyone | | Tuesday, February 19th, 2008 | | 5:35 pm |
I'm still not dead, but sometimes it kinda feels like it. Everything kinda fell apart as soon as I got to AZ and I can't seem to pull myself back up again. Plus there's nothing like 2 months of blistering hot days and frozen sleeping bags at night to put you in a good state of mind to pull yourself back together. Weee | | Sunday, December 23rd, 2007 | | 12:40 pm |
It is no longer Nikki's Birthday
HAPPY LATE BIRTHDAY TO NIKKII!!!!!!! I finally had my car towed out of the campground to civilization in time to miss your birthday. But I love you. I love you like a chubby kid loves cake. With that said Fuck NY and this snowy mountainous wasteland. Fuck having to be towed out of my house. And fuck bears. I'm outta here. Cat Tour 2008 starts early this year and I'll try and make as many stops as possible. Happy holidays and all the rott | | Tuesday, November 27th, 2007 | | 8:58 pm |
Sorry for all the movies, but this stuff is awesome. Crystal Skulls, Ancient battery from Bahgdad, and a greek computer I've heard of this stuff, but haven't seen the videos or had it narrated in an english accent | | Saturday, November 17th, 2007 | | 1:30 am |
| | 1:27 am |
Still no luck on selling my very rare, and no doubt scientifically valuable bacteria cultures. I've even dropped the price to $5 a 20oz bottle. Tell your friends. It's for science | | Thursday, November 15th, 2007 | | 9:36 pm |
I'm a Disease
That's right! Suffering from wierd pains and the need to tinkle constantly, I was diagnosed with a Kidney infection! The hospital gave me drugs, nothing happened. So when I started pissing blood I went back a little concerned. They gave me drugs and tried to force pain pills down my throat.. nothing happened. But they did give me funny looks 'cause I didn't think pain pills were candy. Talked to an outpatient doctor and BOY OH BOY! I have something exciting to tell you. I have a Rare bacteria growing in my kidneys! Uh huh, that's right. Rare bacteria. It's almost Never seen outside of hospitals and laboratories. special. Oh, And.. It's immune to almost all antibiotics! AHAHA! Yeah. You know what that means? No? i will tell you It's the super staph!! Super Resistant Stapphalycocus in my Kidneys! I'm going to sell the cultures to pay for my medical bills. Anyone need any biowarefare weapons or a research project gimmie a call. Is it illegal to sell urine on ebay? So diagnoses is I pop pills until either I go into shock from blood poisoning or I get better. Glee! | | Monday, October 22nd, 2007 | | 5:56 pm |
Pyrus and his Beautiful Pony
Hi everybody! I really miss everyone and I've been really bad at being in touch. That's because I am a bad person. But basically here's what's going down in my life. I'm going to get pictures uploaded really soon. If you see what I'm actually getting to do here you may either a- forgive me for being out of touch or b- Hate me for beingout of touch but lemme present my case Currently we're still all working of Forest of Fear, the great big haunted house that takes place next to the faire in Tuxedo NY. I got to design two of my own room for the house and help out with alot of it. I've really learned alot from the other people here about sets and props and gore and such. New York Times showed up one of the nights to veiw our house, and Haunted Attractions Magazine came up another night. My Creative Director says that on both of these nights one of my rooms became one of the feature pieces. We've also been the set for two independent films. I'm doing a fire show at this haunted house too, we're apparently one of the bigger draws. One night when be canceled one of our 4 shows 20 people left demanding their money back since they came to see the fire show. I've also been selected to be in this guys film, it's some sort of a music video/art film like the Gorrillaz stuff. Dude says it's the waaaaay of the fuuuuture or something. I'll be making 6% of the sales profits too! WOO! But I got screwed on my performance pay for the sake of peace keeping with another fire performer. oh well. It looks like I'll be staying on site, in the mountains in the trailer for the winter. It's cold and spooky but free and near school. Vandal was going to be crashing with me and helping me fend off bears, but he may be spending his winter in Oklahoma. Politics at work are starting to drive him off, and he's pretty sure this coming saturday he'll be martyred and lynched by angry office ladies. George will probably still be staying on site too, and bears are scared of him as well. Still my friend is leaving. We might be doing a Dickens X-mas thing here this winter. That is if corporate doesn't martyr Vandal and everyone quits. But that means more work and design into the winter time. oy. Well, I miss you kids, I'll be calling and harrasing yo late at night sometime soon. so bewaaare. BEWAAARE | | Saturday, July 21st, 2007 | | 8:02 pm |
He's a simple man who like simple things, Like butter in his ass and a lollipop in his mouth
wow.. there's alot going on in NY Things are super fucking busy, it's almost opening weekend and a Military Coup just took place with the front office making Vandal the new site manager. A couple of my co-workers seem to have lost their minds in the art department, and nerves are wearing things. It's getting harder and harder to just Avoid whatevers going on between them.. I Still haven't had enough daylight hours off to move into my tent. Crashing with Vandal is rad but I want my campspot dammit. And some Privacy. And some quiet, yeesh. Not that I'm going to be getting much of that considering as soon as I move out the campground will probably be Packed with actors on some demented sort of Renaisance vacation in the steamy, bug infested woods of Upstate NY. sick fucks. Today was supposed to be my day off, but that's gone. Then it was going ot be yesterday but thats gone too. So my first day off will most likely be the monday after opening weekend, But that may change to some other later date too. I'm never gonna get my house Missed the Gogol bordello show due to extreme exhaustion and my friends awesome aniversary dinner sadly.. kinda.. But other than the last minute stressors things are going good. It's looking like I may get a big promotion and be managing my department rather than just a peon. I've got my own stage to design and I'm working on prop building and crazy shit like that now rather than just painting walls. A buncha my Rennie peeps should be coming from Colorado to live in NY so things won't be so lonely and desolate. I'm also considering changing my major in school to something like Production and set/prop design since I'm already in the field, I'm developing alotta connections, and it's one of the first jobs I can honestly say I enjoy. My boss, Buffy (hehe, No she's awesome and will kick you in the teeth)is going to work on finding me awesome colleges and foundry projects for internships and well and Give me her job! WHAHAHA New York Renaissance faire will soon be run entierly by punk rockers and homos. glory days I miss everyone back in MD and everywhere else my populous of homies is scattered though and still spend alotta time pissing people off with ridiculous stories about people they don't know. it's glorious. I miss Louis and his madness too. But everyone drop me a line if you can and all that good crap. There should be a trailer moving in next to me with a wireless signal soon so I will hopefully be able to verify my existance more often lurv | | Friday, June 22nd, 2007 | | 9:42 pm |
Paprika devices
HEYO!!! Well... Currently I'm stationed in Mulletville, TN. Just rolled out of a wonderful job in NY with excellent co-workers. Got to work in the art department of the Tuxedo Rennaisance Faire, dig some holes, construct some what not, and breath some fires. They want me to come back full time, and are trying to break my legs so I stay there during the MD faire. BUT After this week I should be back in MD for at least a little while. My best friend from third grade called me while I was in Texas and Emily Cappa-head, my friend, should be joining me in MD for a while in July. We'll be in MD for a bit and may be running back and forth to NY if I can interrogate her and sell her for slave labor. Going back the Baltimore was good too. Me and Monie got to hang, and Louis is Lovely as always. It wasn't as stressful as I thought it could be and it was super good to see him again. Sadly, we only got to visit for like... and hour. Maybe 2 tops. Blah. But I'll be back soon hommes. I'm not real sure where I'll be located or what I'll be doing in the next couple months, but I'm alive and doing better than usual. So Call me! Or sommething. your mom | | Saturday, May 26th, 2007 | | 2:19 am |
Girls are Schiesty, especially the schiesty ones
Just to inform everyone! I have not dropped off the face of the planet. No. There are however alot more more tornados and torrential monsoons in Texas than I remember. There's also a plauge of butterflys signifying the apocolypse, one of them even bit my friend. This is quickly being followed by a plauge of spiders. Texas has been harder than I expected and I get very little time off of site without a car full of moochers, friends, or tagalongers. Life after Scarbarough Faire is a bit of a mystery too, but I'm sure I'll figure it out and it will involve me getting injured and setting something on fire. Louis visit didn't go as I'd hoped, but I think that was expected. But everything between us seems to be as cool as it can be. oh joy weeee Just remember Louis, I had the chance to cut your dick off and I didn't do it. Anyway, I miss all you kids and I'm sorry I've been so shitty about keeping in touch. I'll touch you when I get back into you town. If anyone wants a visit lemme know and I'll pencil you in on CAT TOUR 2007! ROCK! | | Friday, February 23rd, 2007 | | 11:22 pm |
11ish pm on a Friday night and no ones on. Did the band break up or something? Did all of you turn into old men when I wasn't looking? And just when I found a place to get free internet and steak. and a halfa a gallon of mashed pertaters. PERTATERS!! tater | | Monday, January 29th, 2007 | | 11:47 pm |
Hickory smoked! You so crazy!
Well I'm in Arizona, but don't tell Rika so I can still get her kidneys. Me, Christian and Schwem drove down here on a 6 day trip. 6 days since I-10 was shut down in AZ and we found out we could have a place to live in the snowy wasteland until monday anyway. We wound up stopping in TN to visit Nikki and her wacky peeps. Then somehow got to New Orleans, which is still a complete fucking disaster zone full of army people and Military Hummers. Got to gamble on a river boat in Baton Rouge And I bitch slapped Christian for his insolence. Then off to Houston to stay with Christians mom, meet some of his hommies, and drink free beer. Then off to San Antonio to go crash with Lynati and Aaron in thier ginourmous house. .. Then we slept in the desert and on some indian reservation. hoo yeah Now we're settling in to a nearly empty site and getting ready to huncker down for a night of drinking pre made margaritas and rum. Before I forget there's some stuff I wanted to mention Nikki, sorry if Christian traumatized your contortionist friend. He's good at traumatizing girls though. Louis, I don't think it ever clicked or I acknowledged you like you wished. Your keeping of the house is a vital role. You're like the vestal virgin of our motley crew, just without the vestal or the virgin part. The keeper of the flame..ing house. Rika, I'm glad your back even if just in momentary spurts. Maybe now that you're finally gotten a good hot dicking we'll see some more of you. Horray hot dickings! congratiuitousulations. that is all | | Tuesday, December 26th, 2006 | | 1:42 am |
Happy Festivus. I'm not dead. For the most part. Hope all of you guys are mostly alive too | | Sunday, November 12th, 2006 | | 5:28 pm |
| | Tuesday, July 11th, 2006 | | 11:05 pm |
Dear Java Guru, I'm sorry to inform you that have a password free open port with a strong signal next to the place I need to run some errands in ripe ground for pirateing. I live in a tent and don't have money for you shitty coffee, or the tolerence for your yuppie trash clientle in your small but corporate shop. Having a free port means that I can use it without having to drink your swill or deal with people. I personally believe that information and the internet should be free for everyone, which is why I have this handy little wi-fi card. Since you portrayed yourself as a hip little joint I thought perhaps you had an open mind and felt the same way. Unfortunetly your pastey and awkward night manager informed me otherwise. Here are a few helpful suggestions if you don't like pirates in your parking lot after hours: - Get a password. It's not hard. It takes 30 seconds if that and you can give it to paying customers after you relieve them of their money. - Turn off your server when you close down for the night. If only people buying coffee may use it there's not reason to keep it on and open. - Pull the stick out of your ass. My not purchasing a $6 cup of coffee and than useing only enough bandwidth to run AIM won't break you, I promise. I hope you find these suggestions helpful. Should another parking lot confrontation arraise I'll make it a point to pee in your espresso beans. Cat | | Monday, June 12th, 2006 | | 2:18 am |
Five Gorrillas!
So here's the quick run down: -Left Texas, car broke down in LaJunta Colorado. Had to plop down almost $400 to get it running in time to get to faire. -Lost the job I was going to get because of it. -May have to put down even MORE money to get a bad motor mount OR bad CV joints fixed. Called my parents who when I left (felt so guilty for sending my sister off to college and telling me to fuck all)were Insistant that I call them if I have any money troubles to find them trying to back out of that deal. Apparently I was just supposed to call them, not actually possibly need money. -Got to Colorado, searched for a job for a few days, found one working games for a guy named Spurvey (The Spurvert). -Had to pee real bad, thought I opened my tent door but swan dove through the screen door rendering the whole thing Broken. -First day of the job, find out Spurvey just bought the King of the Log game and I'm the only one who knows anything about it. This is the job I all but swore I would never do again after some dude punched me in the face and another one hulked out of his shirt trying to fight me. Somehow people in Colorado take it even worse than anywhere else. They're terribley offended whenever I try to challenge them and find the idea of hitting another person with Anything, much less a pillow, quite apalling. Too much floruide in the water me thinks. -Get home from shittiest first weekend yet to find a giant wind storm ripping up what's left of my tent and my phone missing. I've yet to count what money I have hidden there but there's been a rash of thievery lately and I have a feeling both my phone, and some cash, are gone for good. Batteries are dead on it too so it makes it alot harder to track down. -Went to a club in Denver which everyone raves about, found mini Hitler and The Corpse Bitch, very dissapointed in the music. But now I'm geeking out, stealing wireless froma local gym with Christian. I really miss you Louis, I'm gonna be home soon. Same with everyone else I'm not having sex with too. Maybe sooner if this bad luck keeps up. Although at this point I'm concerned what the universe has to dish out for me if I try to drive home. Current Mood:  exhaustedCurrent Music: The sound of me being near pennyless | | Monday, April 3rd, 2006 | | 10:10 pm |
Moneky hate parsley!!
Things aren't really looking better for Texas. I'm quickly losing my sense of humor about my bosses gruff and demanding personality, today was an especially callous day though. I'm a hard worker, and I don't complain about the labor, but I want at least a certain level of common decency. I don't deal real well with having angry commands shouted at me and being told I'm in the way after following an order. I may very well quit, and possibly have to drive back to MD, if he doesn't remove whatever large insect has lodged itself in his colon. I'm not that desperate for money or shelter to put up with this for 2 months, I'll starve in the fucking gutter before I let someone believe this is how I can be treated. A shitty day is fine, I can handle that, but another day of this and he's out of an onsite worker. I don't care if I have to blow truckers for cash to get back to MD, it's got more self respect. Peeling and sauteeing 50lbs of onions while being yelled at tends to wear on a persons nerves. But I was handleing it pretty well up until the point I almost got attacked by a spider monkey, somehow that set me off for the rest of the night. My aweseom coworker Kevin is now my roomie though, and two other workers showed up also by chance happening to be awesome. Husband and wife duo, Rockabilly biker and a nature kinda chick, Jess and Justin. Also remembered I left All my instruments at home and there's massive drum jams and stuff going on when the rest of the Rennies finally get in from Arizona. At least I now know where to get beer and steal internet. Makes me miss who, who i hope forgives me for the nasty April Fools prank. Current Mood: Texas Blows |
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